The part where my blog gets nasty

So I was talking with the roomie last night and found out I had not shared my "I'm a complete and utter idiot story" of me and my knowledge of the birds and the bees. After causing her near death from laughing I have decided I must share it with the world.

Blow jobs, giving head... You hear about as soon as you become a teenybopper... can't help it... kids like to try to be dirty. These days they are dirty instead of just talking about it. But until 11th grade oral sex wasn't clear to me... Yes people, I thought until that, oral sex meant talking dirty... I couldn't figure how folks on Montel and Maury and Jenny were getting in car wrecks by talking dirty while driving. I don't know what set off my realization. Perhaps a lightbulb moment...although mine was a bit dim.

I knew what blow jobs were.. I just didn't know that it was also oral sex.. and on the flip side I didn't realize chicks were receiving until college... Really more like my junior year when I hear a friend saying how he loved giving it...so apparently it was common...who knew? Not me, the wanted to wait til marriage til I was how old?/I'm so not getting that near my mouth girl.

See I was too smart... you give an oral dissertation it means talking... so oral sex, talking sex...no? Not quite? Sigh... I'm special ya know...

Deep thoughts by Shoes Handy

1. If you do weight watchers and get ill during the day do you get points back...how many...
2. If a show pisses me off so much, why do I still watch it.. Greys Anatomy, all caught up.
3. Why does my cat want me when I am trying to sleep or get ready for work. I give love all day long but she only wants it at the wrong times...this is another reason I love dogs.
I don't have much more...i guess I'm not that deep.

So what did you do this weekend

I hiked. I picked off ticks..lots and lots of ticks. I love my pups dearly but boy was it a lot of work and i do put stuff on them to prevent it.. It just doesn't work when they are that bombarded. It was a nice hike out in Farmington and Simon was as happy as a pig in mud.

Sunday was the regular knitting and I think I got to see my first crazed bride... She had a little glare in the her eyes...

Monday we grilled and I think I might just not like tilapia.. I wanted it more flavorful and more crispy.. Perhaps grilling in tin foil versus in stove is the problem.

I also started painting my woodwork in my house. I took a long break in the home repair but finally have gotten started again. It need to be done at some point and I'm probably going to live in the house forever so I'd like to stop looking at stuff thinking how it needs to be fixed. Who wants to come get rid of all my damn stumps out back. Anyone, Anyone? Bueller?

]I also did some light reading. Included in my reading was a great suprise I got in the mail from Daiva... hannukah and goblins.. woohoo! It was a cute story and good illustration. I was entertained by the "trickery" done the goblins.. they were tricked each night but after the 3rd the author just said that Hershel tricked the goblins the next few nights. (No explanation cause she probably couldn't figure them out). Thanks Daiva, it was fun to read and I'm happy to add it to my Jewish reading collection.

I also started Mr Norrell and Jonathan Strange... So far its not bad but I don't like storybooks that require footnotes and this book is heavy enough to give me a hernia...It reads like the HP books, that is, its children-like but not dumbed down. Have you read the series of unfortunately events... lets just say i think it was all unfortunate. So that's my weekend. I could use like 10 more days of it....

arg there matey

Me and the gimp, I mean my lovely coordinated roomate, are going hiking this weekend. Kinda excited. Kinda wish I had more than two dollars to my name for the Bbq we shall eat after....We haven't broken out our grill yet either....Suddenly I'm picture some mahi mahi with grilled asparagus and baby potatoes...mmm...
Should be a fun saturday after my joint at agility. Probably no tigers like last time but I'll calm kara down from that disappointment...
rawr...tigers

I've been tagged

Each person tagged gives 7 random facts about themselves. I’ve been tagged by Kathy. Except I'm not going to tag anyone. So here ya go, info about moi...

1. I hate the telephone.. I’ve tried very hard to get past this since I don’t live near a lot of my family and friends. Kinda funny since I answer the phone at work. I can answer the phone fine but cold calling I’m the pits at.

2. I love Diet Barq’s rootbeer. An old scrapper friend and I use to drink it by the case. Considering we spent 1-2 Saturdays together a month for a few years scrapping and playing with dogs while she puppy sat, I drank a lot of rootbeer…a lot…now if I drink one soda in a day my hands become all pruney. I can’t seem to keep myself hydrated.

3. I’m way too into animals. I get upset when friend’s animals pets die…towards an end of a friendship with a college chum I knew things weren’t right when I found out off hand that Fred, the golden retriever had died two months after it happened. I had spent a lot of time with him and we talked about him all the time. Yesterday Boo’s aunt told me her dog died two weeks ago at a pretty young age of cancer.. I cried at work. I also just had to rewrite this paragraph cause the yarn dork in me kept writing dye…

4. I have a small allergy to some fresh foods. My throat gets a little swollen. Its not often or specific enough that I abstain from eating anything.

5. I currently contain 5 lbs of snot.. okay maybe not that much but the last week or so my allergies have been all a flutter.

6. I seem to have no particular set clothing style. Not bad, just not set style. Through the years if not the months or days its varies. I do girly girl, artsy chick, plain jane, baggy pants wannabe, etc. Sometimes I think some people would only see me in one of these styles but I probably just present different looks to different people when I know I’m seeing people in particular. At Sunday Knits I’m plain jane, its Sunday ya know? I dress plainer, cleaner if I’m seeing Duane, I’m more girly girl for Eric’s family, and artsy chick for my family. Kara on the other hand gets to see me with mismatched clothes with rain galoshes and bra straps showing… living with me is nothing but interesting.

7. I apparently talk poorly. I slur my words or something or talk too fast because no one understands me… Interesting since I can’t understand my dad cause he appears to slur words too. Neither of us drink much…

Crazy people...

So my parents are going on a foreign trip and have made me power of attorney if anything happens. My brother, the handicrapper is upset because he wasn't made power of attorney. The boy can't write a check, graduate from school, get a job, or basically do anything... Having known him forever I know his handcrapperness is only partially true.. he's also partially a lazy mooch who has no handle on reality...really, he thinks he should have power of attorney... especially after he tells mom how he won't do anything she does for Buby for her. Really people, I don't get the things that go through his head... and this is why you hear next to nothing about my brother. He's too stupid to function.

2nd...

Well its been a hella long day but we got second place in the Jumpers class for Novice 16 inch dogs...(you only compete against your height and your skill level, there were 4 in our group) super complicated to explain it all. We didn't qualify in another course due to different rules for NADAC agility versus AKC... It was a nice day but I am totally freaking wiped. I tried napping but due to construction next door and Sir Barks alot I don't feel very rested.
I now crave meat something awful.. don't know why...too much sun make Hulk Shoes want meat...

too much grey's anatomy, no spoilers

So i've finally hit my wall of GA. I've been watching it alot in download form...I miss pregnant men and general silliness...Now its alot of death and superdrama how they are never happy. I just watched the one with Grey's dad and step mom and the hiccups. Sounds silly, it wasn't. Sure what kind of show would it be with no drama but I'm thinking 10 episodes in two weeks is probably getting to me...once a week drama probably no big deal... I do so love watching shows on the computer though. I can watch whenever I want, multi task and not have to wait with baited breath for the next week or the next segment after the commercial.

Weave, table, over..

Tomorrow I have another dog agility event. As far as I know none of my regular agility friends are going to be at it…bummer. Its nice when other amateurs are there…The gals and guys at class discuss the plan of attack to make each of our dogs complete the course. I’m hoping perhaps Lori and Freda will be there because they are no longer in Saturday classes which I am ditching for the event. That and Lori has been going to the new agility class in Troy so I don’t get to see her on Saturdays any more. I love me some Freda. She’s a German Shepherd with such a funny personality… she goes nuts watching the other dogs “play.” I’m also a tad nervous because its at a different location that normal so that comfort factor is gone. It will be nice being outside versus inside at a horse arena. Its going to be 80 degrees and a bit toasty out in the sun but at least I won’t be breathing in dirt all day. Simon is in the very first event so it will be an early morning. I’m all packed up and currently dying yarn. I should have used this energy earlier and mowed my lawn. Who knows, maybe I’ll get home and magically be full of energy and mow my 10 inch tall grass…ha!

do surf or blog line

Considering how blogger works and making edits makes a post republished I wonder how many of you just visit the page and how many just get the handy dandy emails sent to you... I prefer the surfing myself.

Its true

If you blog it something happens... if you blog you can't find your cards, you do!
Woohoo...
Today I'm mailing out my cards for submission and my sold skein of yarn...Tonight I prepare for tomorrow's agility show and pack entertainment of knitting and The other Bolyn girl. I've never been to the Purina farms so I'm intrigued.

Sold...

So I've sold three skeins of my yarn through my etsy shop... No i didn't mention it to anyone because then i feel like a Pampered Chef troll..anyway it makes me a happy little camper...

I think the woohoo factor is keeping me awake right now cause I sold my "pigs in space" this evening...the picture show is "Kermit loves Piggy" Do you catch the theme...

I did a post on how much I love Lunesta and wouldn't you guess. I can't sleep...

So sleep, yeah its good,not happening at the moment. I post about it, then karma kicks in and kicks ya in the keester...

I know this sounds stupid but I watched 28 weeks later tonight and it sometimes makes me reflect when I watch zombies movies..like what would you do? what category would you fit into. If you managed to be a survivor which one would you be.. would you even survive and choose to stay alive or die at your own hand like the parents in 28 days later. Sheesh if I was in zombie works then I'd be without my 'zac or my lunesta... cause zombie insurance just doesn't cover drugs like they used to so I'd be a crazy sleep deprived gal... my ex boyfriend can tell you that's not what you want...

So do you think I'll find it

if i post here that I can't find my cards i made for submissions.... I'm gonna look at work tomorrow if i remember... (i take them there to scan and print out submission paper cause I don't have a printer)

It may have been wishful thinking

But I pulled my hair back in a bun today... from the German guy he said i looked very nice, very italian today... I like my Loretta hair as my other coworker calls it.. I do a little poof for my bangs...the wishful thinking is in thinking it will stay that way.. I've got growing out short hair and i know I'm gonna look dishevelled with fallen wisps of hair by the end of the day.


Anyway I thought i'd throw a question out there today.. If you could have plastic surgery for one thing what would it be.


Me and my chins would have a chin tuck. Having watched nip tuck I doubt I'd ever have the balls for something like that but if i was in magical land that would be my choice. You can lose weight, wear a better bra, etc but that chin just sits there or sags there in shame. And the older you get the less elastic you skin gets the longer it gets... Gobble Gobble.


So what would be your plastic of choice..

Remember High school

when you didn't think you were good enough...I don't know enough for what...where we worried about what others thought and we thought we sucked... how did we grow out of it... I know someone going through it and is a late bloomer... here I am more confident than ever and they are going through feeling like they are 15. At a certain point you realise everyone is the same, even the ones you think couldn't possibly have doubts of their worth.
When you are a teen one day you want to do one thing next day something else. One day an artist, the next a farmer, dr, candle stick maker..but they aren't 15. 15 year olds can change careers daily. 20 somethings can't. Or I think they can't... because to switch careers daily would mean you don't get through the work for the final goal for any of the desires.
Right now this friend wants to visit family that does change careers alot but they see things through and work hard. I know they will tell him to go where his desire moves him not thinking that in 6 months to a year he'll be right back where he started cause thats his attention span. I think his family is his happy place but after a few days its not but from where he is standing he can't see that.
sigh... life is challenging right now...knitting though is rocking, does that count?

Spending Time with my Knomies...or Knit Homies

So this week I knit with the likes of Sassy Krafty, the Spinster , and a handful of other STL knitters, a large hand complete with a few extra fingers. It was a super fun time. Perhaps I should have an exclamation point or something to show how much fun i really did have. While there I finished my super cool sock... I should have gone half a pattern more before i started my toe so its not perfect and has a few extra rows at the end of the toe decrease. I'm super happy with it none the less.. I even have my next cuff done.. I'm catching up with Grey's anatomy and knitting while i watch.

I love the color. In person its a bit darker, more intense. So much that I dyed another skein of it for no good reason last night. I also dyed some skeins of kona yarn and it freaking rocks... I did striped patterns and with all this heat i can probably wind them up tonight cause stuff is drying up fast. I have 4 480 inch round skeins to turn to pretty tiny skeins... anyone wanna do laps.. no? I didn't think so...My dogs are smart...can't I train them to do that...I want to do get a few more skeins ready but they may require a bit more math so I'll actually need to do some prep... Animal and Sgt Floyd Pepper colors... I want to do them at the same time since they both have some of the same colors in them, thus saving time and energy.

Well its friday so you know what that means. The truffle shuffle.

1. Thank you for the music - Abba

2. Roller Coaster - Ohio Players

3. You can’t get a man with a gun – Annie Get your Gun - Ethel Merman
4. You’re the boss – bb king and ruth brown
5. Ex-Girlfriend – No Doubt
6. If you only knew – Jurassic 5
7. Members Only – Sheryl Crow
8. Snoopy vs the Red Baron - Royal Guardsmen
9. Rock and Roll Stew - Traffic

10. I can see clearly now - Johnny Nash

Peace and Knittiness foreva!

Its crack baby

Archer Farms Cinnamon and sugar pita chips..
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I ate a whole bag today..and licked my fingers that were covered in sugary goodness.

Aw Mel Gibson visited me yesterday

Okay maybe not Mel "I'm a little f-ed up but hey you've all forgiven me" Gibson but his cronies did. Ah a flyer about how the Holocaust didn't happen. That shit just brightened up my pre coffee morning. I'd like to wax and wane about my thoughts on this shit but its not worth my time. I'm pretty sure the supporters of this idea aren't quite follow my little jew girl blog...
So it Wednesday and I've got plans for Knitorious this evening where I will finish up my rock sock...I'm so excited with it I'm a bit cocky... sorry..just smack me once or twice...
Other than that not much to say.. the veggie garden is officially planted..I decided to plant my squash in my garden versus buckets because i have a lot more room now that i'm not planting a grove of food for the iguanas :(
I do think i will use the pots to grow lettuce maybe some additional squash just cause i love how it looks... it kinda would be cool to grow it in my front pot of my house but i should, emphasis on should, be removing it and finish peeling and painting my stairs and porch... its not going well...I think i may need to realize i just need to fleck off the loose paint and just paint over it... so many painting jobs, so little underpaid workers to help me.

String and Music

So this week's friday shuffle is being preceded by my yarn i've been dying...

The below sock I dyed from my coworker and she is knitting up into a jaywalker.


Then my Pulp Fiction Piggy as I call it that I'm just tickled pink with...


If I can figure out space issues better I'd dye with my knit group who'd like to try it but my house/kitchen are teeny tiny... two in the kitchen is tight and 3 is just pushing it.
Not much else toreport so onto the Truffle Shuffle.


1. Beer – Asylum Street Spankers
2. F**ck the pain away – Peaches
3. Zealots – Fugees
4. Anything you can do – annie get your gun – Ethel Merman
5. I am Changing – Dreamgirls – Jennifer Hudson
6. King without a Crown – Matisyahu
7. Party Girl - Ween
8. Small Town - John Mellencamp
9. Equinox – Liquid Soul
10. Dashboard – modest mouse

Is it 6 yet?

Cause I'm ready to go to Knittorious and get my knit on!

In the city ladies look pretty

I'm a Wednesday Knit Wit.... Look at my awesome sock.. I turned the heel last night and I'm super happy with it.. I like the short row pattern that was given. Nothing much else to report. Probably going knitting tonight...I'm pretty stoked about this sock.
(Edit, yes those are scans...a popular question)