Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Old Concept Revisited

Who here has personalities? Just me? No, we all do. I have a work me, I have a knitting me, I have a JDawg me (Where the crass me comes out, its awesome but not for the faint of heart), I have a family me, I have an inlaw me (which is way quieter and more domestic), I have a STL me, gardener me and the list goes on. So with the advent of the internet its hard to keep them separate. Some people don't care. I do. On twitter I talk a lot, if I'm fed through your phone I'll annoy you. I also randomly yell on it when I'm annoyed. Here I meld a lot of my personalities but its still somewhere I don't share with all. I don't want my family here, if you have any contact with my family, or my in-law family I'd rather you not see my crazy bitchy self :) I feel the same about twitter... So when the lines intersected a few months ago i freaked the fuck out and blocked the world. I don't have twitter on here anymore and I don't have my blog listed there, although i may say if i posted something interesting and include a link.
I have incredible jewish guilt about this. Had I kept my feed private or require requests I wouldn't have had this problem but now I'm the bitch that blocked you. Sorry, let me say it here if you perchance land here. I'm sorry but can't we just keep some things just on email. If i have something interesting on here that I think my mom would like i send her a copied version of the post with all hyperlinkage removed.
Its just weird. I don't mind my worlds melding when it comes to friend but there is something about family, friend, spouses world colliding without my presence there that is unnerving. Had we not been so tech savey we'd see folks once in a while and bond but now we in each other's constant view and its just not so good. There is something about people who don't have filters, people who aren't in touch with reality, and people who know your dirty secrets, or the people who don't know your dirty secrets blending that isn't good and I worry too much about stuff that probably isn't happening. Really, if people see things, or hear things about me and dislike me I should be okay with it, not everyone likes everyone...its just the way it goes. And if I don't like you, you probably are allowed to dislike me (hopefully for a good reason), but it still stings if either finds out about the other's dislikes.
I know Boo has some issues with the Blarg lately, his friends, who are mine too see the blog.. I think he thinks I'm on here ripping him a new one but I learned long ago that doing that is oh so not smart. That and we don't rip new ones in person, no need to get balsy on the internet. I do wish he'd actually read the blog but alas, I'm not talking about Italian soccer so that just isn't going to happen ("Go Roma!")
Anyway, enough blubbering about this would be a lot more light hearted if the Doogie Howser typing sound was in the background...
queue the blue screen and white click click click click click click click click....


Anonymous Andrea said...

When I started my first blog, Little Bald Doctors, I told everyone in my real life about it. That was a mistake but I didn't know I was making it since I was new to blogging. Then, after the drama and crap got to be too much, I closed LBD and started a new, anonymous one. But it was too retaliatory, too mean and frankly, wasn't good for me. Sure, I have aspects of my personality that are incredibly snarky and opinionated, but it was mean spirited and I didn't want to keep it up. So I quit that one too and started the knitting one. We'll see how that one goes. But I get it, all the personalities, all the who is saying what to whom business and such. It really is unnerving.

9:05 AM  
Blogger Justin said...

I love that I have my own version of you and that it's awesome :D

9:42 AM  
Blogger Shannon said...

I don't really separate myself that much. I'm too lazy really. I might be more polite at work or my inlaws, and smile a lot when I don't mean it but it isn't really a different personality. Isn't it tiring?

11:48 AM  
Blogger That's a 7-letter Deborah, never a Deb said...

I totally felt this way and used to freak out when I would see co-workers, friends, etc. out of context. Same with the blog--I found out my mother was reading and am really struggling to keep writing. I'm working on getting over it though. It's funny b/c facebook crushes all those groups together, which has helped me a bit.

6:08 PM  

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