Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Dem Bones

I'm not big into duck but when I saw a vegetarian option for my kosher home I bought it. Boo liked it, Kara like it, I'm still not into duck.
When I opened the package on Saturday I was amused to see the fake poultry shape... I was mortified when I flipped it over and saw spine and rib cage...Really? does this make it more convincing in its fake duck or Fuck as I like to call it. I still merge words as wrestling guy/drug dealer Jon taught me in high school, fake meat, feat, fucking ugly, fugly... you know how it goes. Which side note, i think high school lunch is the cruelest thing on earth and I still have stressful dreams of where to sit, will you know someone etc. Senior year and junior year I sat every other day with some dorks of the male persuasion. Sadly, I fit in there better than with the smart well rounded guy/girl tables where people were squooshed trying to fit in, and not just physically, or the lesbian/thespian table, I sat with them every other day. Dude, i didn't even fit in with the marching band folks which frankly i think had as much clout in the school as the sports team, they certainly won more than our football team (sorry RB).
I did get a few weeks in of hiding on the otherside of the guys before the l/t noticed I was gone from their table but still lunching with someone, it was nice for a bit before I was found out, cause boy was I ridiculed. Obviously I had the hots for all of the dorks and thats why I was sitting there. In reality, I had the hots for one, super christian straightedge dude which really would have worked out well, and the rest let me sit there and read if I so wished and didn't taunt me. In fact, I read about judiasm a lot so I was in a way that super crazy jewish gal instead of christian crazy. Damn, I hate how 4 stupid years of your life are a) looked upon so damn fondly by most and b) freaking scar us or at least stay in our brains for like, forever...effing a-.
Tangent, end, pics of creepy fake duck, commence.


Blogger Jeannette E. Spaghetti said...

I am a word-merger, too. In California, I stopped with a friend to get some food and the name of the restaurant was Swalls. I realize that the ocean has swalls, but for me, swalls are sweaty/balls.

Your FUCK is creepy. Then again, what are they gonna do - shape it like a meatloaf?

5:16 PM  
Anonymous Brown said...

Ahem. There's a trophy in the case for our WINNING football team, thank you very much. :P

Did you know our head coach is now the defensive coordinator for the Jets?

You know, I still call that imitation crab meat "frab" thanks to good ol' John.

6:11 PM  
Blogger Tempest ina Pot of Tea said...

Those words are called portmanteaus. My Cuz and I spent several weeks writing a romance novella using portmanteaus. I especially liked when the heroine's wheamy (white + creamy) thighs were loressed (lovingly + caressed). I think romance novels would be much funnier and shorter written that way.

2:25 PM  
Blogger Ink Stained Roni said...

Oh my, that stuff is scary looking....don't know if I'd have been brave enough to eat it or not ;)
You will be happy to know that I'm really into chinese food now that we have one here in town.

7:03 PM  

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