Beware of Vampires and Matzah
Well I'm back in the STL. Flying freaks my shit out. Airports are common space for all walks of life, all the walks I like to ignore. I end up focusing on family dynamics. I see old people and relate them to my family. I see young families and realize I could be a mom of 2.
In the Philly Airport I get to play a game. Its called pick out the foreigners. By foreigners I mean literally that. People flying back to their respective countries. You don't get that in St. Louis. I gotta say, damn, Europe is Aryan. I swear the blonds I see flying off to Europe (after seeing passports or hearing them talk) are all sorts of blonder than the American version.
It took me forever to get checked in. I don't get the people who do the self check in thing but obviously need to talk to a check-in person. Like the couple going to a southern country with their 2 year old and 5 month old who wasn't born when they bought the tickets. Come on folks, think!
Obviously I wasn't thinking when I changed my seat to the A seat which meant I had no one on either side. I a) got a broken seat b) moved closer to screaming baby and c) forgot I can't sleep leaning to the left in a seat. Damn if I didn't try. I don't know what I was thinking. I blame it all on lack of coffee. Mom bought no milk so I had no coffee while home (creamer or whatnot wasn't available either.) It still being Passover means I won't eat anything outside of my house. I didn't kosher my house so I'm sorta eating out of a bag of food. Its very classy. Friday at work might consist of me drinking cups and cups of coffee and subsequently taking many a potty break. Especially if I've only been eating matzah if you get what I'm saying.
Back to the sleeping. I'm a tad odd. When I was younger I always slept with my neck covered. I figured if a vampire came to suck your blood they didn't want to wake you up ahead of time. If your neck was covered then obviously he wouldn't suck your blood. And by he only males can suck females blood, duh!
When attempting to sleep on the plane I don't sleep well if too much of my neck is exposed. I also feel like in certain positions my head may just snap off. Seriously. Heads are heavy... Don't ya just want to let loose and drop your head back on your chair or sofa that you're on right now. No, just me.. ah, okay...
Well Shady's back, it was a hard visit, they always are and doing it alone sucks. I'm a self reflector and watching my future in front of me doesn't help. Mom and I were talking about some family money that we won't ever see. Sure I called it future generations we won't know money fund but I think I ought to pitch the idea of the Fucking Zwickel Gene Dimensia Fund for Long Term Care. Grandma had it, her mom had it hence the Zwickel, Dad's starting it. Dad of course won't make a single future plan of his life but I informed my parents they are both going away for a long time... I mean..... I like the idea of the senior complexes, where you still have your own home and such. Mom and I discuss this stuff especially with the way Buby is now. Half the time she cries about being a burden and the other half is insanely screaming at the world. Why the burden half won't go to a facility where they could have constant companionship and more to do, I don't know. Because really the other idea of putting a bag on your head is much smarter.
Mom wants to make her future plans and such but since most of my dad's family is living in lala land and has drained my parents of most of their financial abilities thats not happening. Sometimes, like today, Dad and I have a better relationship. Other times he's a fucking idiot and an ass... Please, don't let me become my mom, waiting to live my life. Mr. I hate mom born in 1981 called so many times a day its insane.. He is to my mom what she was to her mom. I'm grateful to not be that dependent on anyone. Besides, he has no friends, mom has no friends, I at least have one. :P
In the Philly Airport I get to play a game. Its called pick out the foreigners. By foreigners I mean literally that. People flying back to their respective countries. You don't get that in St. Louis. I gotta say, damn, Europe is Aryan. I swear the blonds I see flying off to Europe (after seeing passports or hearing them talk) are all sorts of blonder than the American version.
It took me forever to get checked in. I don't get the people who do the self check in thing but obviously need to talk to a check-in person. Like the couple going to a southern country with their 2 year old and 5 month old who wasn't born when they bought the tickets. Come on folks, think!
Obviously I wasn't thinking when I changed my seat to the A seat which meant I had no one on either side. I a) got a broken seat b) moved closer to screaming baby and c) forgot I can't sleep leaning to the left in a seat. Damn if I didn't try. I don't know what I was thinking. I blame it all on lack of coffee. Mom bought no milk so I had no coffee while home (creamer or whatnot wasn't available either.) It still being Passover means I won't eat anything outside of my house. I didn't kosher my house so I'm sorta eating out of a bag of food. Its very classy. Friday at work might consist of me drinking cups and cups of coffee and subsequently taking many a potty break. Especially if I've only been eating matzah if you get what I'm saying.
Back to the sleeping. I'm a tad odd. When I was younger I always slept with my neck covered. I figured if a vampire came to suck your blood they didn't want to wake you up ahead of time. If your neck was covered then obviously he wouldn't suck your blood. And by he only males can suck females blood, duh!
When attempting to sleep on the plane I don't sleep well if too much of my neck is exposed. I also feel like in certain positions my head may just snap off. Seriously. Heads are heavy... Don't ya just want to let loose and drop your head back on your chair or sofa that you're on right now. No, just me.. ah, okay...
Well Shady's back, it was a hard visit, they always are and doing it alone sucks. I'm a self reflector and watching my future in front of me doesn't help. Mom and I were talking about some family money that we won't ever see. Sure I called it future generations we won't know money fund but I think I ought to pitch the idea of the Fucking Zwickel Gene Dimensia Fund for Long Term Care. Grandma had it, her mom had it hence the Zwickel, Dad's starting it. Dad of course won't make a single future plan of his life but I informed my parents they are both going away for a long time... I mean..... I like the idea of the senior complexes, where you still have your own home and such. Mom and I discuss this stuff especially with the way Buby is now. Half the time she cries about being a burden and the other half is insanely screaming at the world. Why the burden half won't go to a facility where they could have constant companionship and more to do, I don't know. Because really the other idea of putting a bag on your head is much smarter.
Mom wants to make her future plans and such but since most of my dad's family is living in lala land and has drained my parents of most of their financial abilities thats not happening. Sometimes, like today, Dad and I have a better relationship. Other times he's a fucking idiot and an ass... Please, don't let me become my mom, waiting to live my life. Mr. I hate mom born in 1981 called so many times a day its insane.. He is to my mom what she was to her mom. I'm grateful to not be that dependent on anyone. Besides, he has no friends, mom has no friends, I at least have one. :P
posted by Crafty and Crap at 10:27 PM
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